Creating Communities of Belonging

The views expressed are those of the author and do not necessarily reflect the views of ASPA as an organization. 

By Renée Cardarelle
November 3, 2025

Previously I wrote about the epidemic of belonging, describing how people have come to feel so isolated and alone they no longer see the value of lives, their own or others, and how this can lead to violent action. This month I am going to write about how we can find solutions to this problem.

This is, of course, a complex social problem and there are no quick fixes, but together we can begin working on ways to make things better, and it starts with ourselves. Many of us believe the only way to a stronger, more peaceful society is to defeat those who are opposing it, with violence if necessary. This rhetoric so permeates our belief systems that we frequently seek solutions which focus on punishment and retribution. However, there is a growing body of evidence that this is exactly wrong.

For example, in their 2011 book titled Why Civil Resistance Works: The Strategic Logic of Nonviolent Conflict, Erica Chenoweth and Maria Stephan talk about the importance of coming together peacefully to address social issues. Contrary to the popular belief that aggression is the only way to end social conflict, their research indicates that nonviolent action and resistance was ten times more likely to have positive democratic results.

Similarly, when we are facing an epidemic of belonging which is leading to increased anger and violence in our communities, the answer is not to respond with more anger. That only fuels the fire. Instead, a more appropriate response is to build connection with those who feel isolated. It’s about helping them feel like they belong.

Now, this is not an easy task. Reaching people mired in anger and loneliness, who have little trust in others, is difficult. However, the more we build systems which focus on inclusion and caring for our neighbors, the more opportunity there is to reach those who are isolated.

So how do we do this? For starters we can begin by offering safe places. Now this isn’t as simple as just putting up a sign. For a space to be safe, individuals in that space need to be taught how to welcome others and to be open to differing perspectives. Spaces feel safe for those who are marginalized, such as people who are angry and alone, when there is respect, empathy and a willingness to listen. These are traits every workplace can value and practice.

It is also important to recognize that sometimes, no matter how much we work on being open and welcoming ourselves, our workplace practices drive people away. This is why we also need to explore policies and office procedures which may exclude people. To really understand how others experience your office setting, take the time to talk to folks about their experience. What barriers do they face when they enter your work setting? What might be some solutions to those barriers? This includes talking to those people who are most difficult to work with, because often those are the people who are most isolated. Rejecting them, even in small ways because of how difficult they are, will often increase their isolation, and identifying ways to welcome them is important.

Change is not going to happen all at once and it takes the whole community to make large cultural changes happen. However, change starts with small steps which build on each other. Working on more inclusive work settings can lead to more inclusive interactions outside the workplace and eventually can lead to more inclusive, community-building activities throughout the community.
It may seem futile to meet anger and divisive behavior with a welcoming atmosphere. It may feel like it will never solve the violent problems in our communities. However, research suggests that it might actually be the only way to do this.

---

Author: Renée Cardarelle has a PhD in Management and Public Service from Hamline University with a focus on public participation in the governing process. In addition to her work in academia, Renée has also worked in the nonprofit sector and in grassroots organizing for more than twenty years.

(1 votes, average: 5.00 out of 5)
Loading...